i want to document running
i don't want to take pictures, there's a difference
it’s 6:13pm, monday. i’m in a cab back to dc from the airport, im sitting on my phone scrolling through photos from being in copenhagen and all at once, a rush of emotion comes when a message comes through “i was so fired up coming that cheer zone and seeing you!” - they are reference km 18 of the copenhagen half, the reason we went to the city in Denmark to begin with.
it touches me because on friday, while in the city trying to avoid ras & vibe so we could surprise them at dinner, i got back to my hotel and got a message from a member of the running community from belfast who in fact, ive not yet met in person.. “Pretty sure I just saw you out for a run in Copenhagen..?” - the point of this and why i bring this up is just how unreal of a world it is that i have the privilege of being able to have as a result of picking up a camera and saying “i want to document running.” - it really is a dream come true.
but before we go any further, i want to make it so incredibly clear. this piece is not about “being popular” or even being know.. its not a piece that has the tone of “so many of you!” like relax ya know. 2 people asked.. anyways.. no, what this piece is about, is the impact and the responsibility i feel on race day, and just in the larger idea of the running world. its about how even one photograph can have an impact.
maybe its best to start before copenhagen? maybe we go back to chicago, ‘23… to downtown in the city spotting adrian along the course.. a moment, seemingly without context just “another” running photo.. but that moment is damn near almost a decade in the making. you see, he and i met by chance one night on delmar street in st. louis outside of a starbucks quite literally over a decade ago. i dont know the exact time but i know it was night time. i saw him, recognized him from the internet. we had 1 mutual friend who had connected us on instagram. he himself, a photographer.. me at the time, just a guy who really enjoyed iphone photos… he’s someone ive been able to learn from not just from conversations but with his work. i dont think this man has chased a trend in his life and his work is a reflection of honesty.. its actually historic work. thats not even being dramatic. he’s just a legend. fast forward, to a street in chicago, there we are, him running towards me, camera ready.. and snap snap snap.. and just like that its gone. the moment has passed.. but.. the photo remains.. meaning the moment lives on. behind the photo, not found in the meta data is a history of admiring his work. a history of mutual friends of ours cheering him on in his career, becoming a father.. and now a marathon runner. i think the science behind a digital photo is way too heavy to explain but its something like a bunch of pixels stitched together.. but nowhere in the science of a photograph is the history and context. its why, its so hard for me to not care. and to be incredibly honest, its why i will never not care about this.
i got messages from him after he was able to see his photos and that enough was a reminder to keep me going. upon him seeing i was in cope for the half, he said “you know im waiting on the write-up.” - its things like that make the marathon moment so special. yes it happens every year, yes there’s multiple but the history and the context is always changing.. and i think this moment with him in chicago is a good place to start..
in that moment, i shouted his name but the often times reverse of that is hearing “CARL!” and as i look its a runner or a friend or in the case of a few times in copenhagen, someone i hadn’t even met! its that, that thing, that feeling.. its the context that again, one day i said “i want to document running.” that now a stranger from another part of the world, knows my work and knows my face and knows my name and feels empowered enough, to get my attention. like, how can you even try to describe how special that is? and goodness me, who the hell am i to turn down the opportunity to document their race in that moment. again, it might be just another photo but imagine working so hard to get to this moment, you’re doing the race you signed up for, you’re locked in and then you spot someone you know with a camera and they don’t photograph you? i couldn’t live myself for missing that..
and yet.. the way my mind works is regardless of the thousands of photos i was able to take during the marathon, i dont think ill be able to let go of missing jack, john, jenna, cara, meg and more.. i dont know why my brain works that way. i dont know what it is about me that will probably dwell on the photos i missed more than enjoy the ones i did take. even having the chance to document amelia’s (i think) first half after a messy training build.. it just wont remove the guilt of missing people. i know i know “it’s no big carl.” and maybe you’re right but idk, i guess i just would rather think it is and have that much care for something as “simple” as a running photo than to not? maybe that attitude will take me further in this world and keep me in the arena longer? we’ll see i guess.
intermission //
we hit pause on this piece as we arrived back in the district and the last well, 36 hours has been nothing short of a sprint as we prepare for another travel sprint.. we’re currently writing from seat 12d of an amtrak train listening to the new keshi album on our way to nyc for four days where we’ll be taking more photos of people running, someone playing soccer and a micheline star chef and then probably more running. and with all of the above, i cant help but feel these emotions from copenhagen and wonder to myself, “what if you just treated everything like race day?” - what if you treated everything with the intensity of passion you have for documenting someone racing a race? admitingly none of the running is as tense as the race but who cares right? a photo of someone enjoying their life, participating the in the rebellion that is running can be celebrated as much during a community run as it does a race right? again if i picked up a camera and said “i want to document running.” - why should i ever think of mailing it in? who the hell am i to do so?
maybe im missing the point here but i remember being shown this video of someone who takes pictures during marathons and in their video they said “here is where i’ll be, look for me!” and ya know.. i don’t know why that bothers me so much.. maybe its because they asked to be tagged in every photo album they share with the masses, which.. again, i understand is maybe not the norm opinion that i share but something about willingly walking out to show up to a race, taking photographs of people, working on them editing them and hitting publish, all while never once asking the people you’re photographing while racing for permission to not only take their photo but also publish it.. and presuming credit should be applied to a post online has just never been something i felt comfortable with.. i think even over time, its something i reject more and more. but back to the original thought.. the idea of “look for me” is just silly, its your job as the photographer to be focused and wait for them. to me, the artists job is to wait for the moment, not schedule it. don’t even get me started with the “tips and tricks” for posing nonsense. to me i guess that’s just not documenting running, its an attempt on gaining traction for pre-planned moments of pre-determined energy.
think about it like this.. what if we one day found out lebron said to wade, “hey.. next time you pass me the ball for a dunk on a fast break, as you run off, spread your wings and look away…” it would sort of lose its magic right? but the reason you even know what im talking about without even showing you the photo is you understand the way that photo made you feel because it was in the moment. and in that, is a chance to admit the hardest photography for me is the kind where things are “planned” - dont’t get me wrong, (in case you’re thinking of hiring me) i am capable of it but its tough. for me it just doesn’t capture the idea of running as well as it can be captured. i think ive talked about this before, maybe not here but maybe just out loud to friends but something i took a lot of pride in with shooting minted new york is this attempt at just using their already planned training runs as the campaign. i think from the very first shoot we had in 2023 to now, i’ve alway felt the best way to tell their story visually is with progression of effort as for me their whole brand is a story of progression. from boxes in marcus’ room to their parents garage to a warehouse, to a bigger warehouse.. that’s me trying to connect the dots between life and art. the visuals go from one place to another. from no sweat to drenched. again.. trying to think about documenting running in a world building way. unspoken context but its why i think people have connected with it over the last twenty months.
all of these things, all of these ideas, all relating to the rounding out of a theme of how important i think it is to document running in a way that is handled with care. i think about the idea of credit a lot and i think about what that means. i think back to pre-pandemic in washington dc, documenting running and really how it felt like there was only just a couple of us. i’m not even being annoying.. i think i was aware of like 5 of us. a lot of people documented boxing thanks to salu and dawson providing the platform but running wasn’t really happening. i remember getting my first On campaign with mona and salu. i remember sitting with vnl and him telling me i need to go somewhere with more visibility. its all been connected. its all been building to the idea of imo being able to be known for the work without even seeing my name attached. from being commissioned by tracksmith years after cold emailing them to ask for apparel to photograph runners to learn how to photograph running. to now being overwhelmed by kind words from nbro running crew since publishing the race day photos.. all of it matters to me. all of it has been a slow build. and yet.. it feels like we’re just getting started all over again.
as we sit here, still in seat 12d, the train rolling along on our way to nyc, gearing up for a whirlwind next couple of weeks, im thinking about the last few weeks. trips to france to document the speed project, austin texas for freaks of nature, the beaches of new jersey for surfing, a couple quick pops to nyc for alex and zara, mini moments here and there to document friends running, its hard to even wrap my head around where the time has gone, where i even found the time to edit, let alone produce anything between shoots.. for me lately, it just feels like i’m in the middle of my own marathon and i gotta tell you, i kind of love this place. (side note: on this new keshi album he has this song called “euphoria” and in it he says, “i know there’s no such thing as a free ride, but when it comes to you, im down to pay the price.” and man.. if that doesn’t relate to how i feel about this current sprint) i think having run 6 marathons myself, a few halfs and even a 24 hour marathon, i think i just understand the idea of having the ability to see the end goal while focusing on whats right in front of me. i’m excited for the next moments to document running. i’m eager to continue to try and make an impact in this world visually. i’m literally exhausted, par for the course for running any marathon, but i’ll tell ya what.. copenhagen felt like a fuel station and all of a sudden we’re feeling good again and ready to go.
because how else is something like being in france less than a month ago and staying at a random hotel in the middle of france and seeing another guy holding a camera in the parking lot of a budget hotel and striking up a conversation about how we’re approaching the race visually to being able to meet his team to then see that same crew just weeks later running in another country, even able to be explained or described in how it makes you feel..? how can i not feel anything about romantic about the idea of running? it’s all possible because it started with a hello and a conversation over a shared love of the sport of running visually.. and then wouldn’t you know it.. the moment chris and his crew runs by, he lifts his arm and fly’s by me.. wade like.. but again.. nothing was planned.. it’s just pure passion. pure energy. all because one day i picked up a camera and said.. “i want to document running.”
and i think i’ll always feel that way.
well, i supposed we should end here. i’m sure this isn’t the last time we talk about running here this month, maybe not even this week but this one has runs its course and i got some prep work to get done before pulling in to new york city… and while we’re a ways from being done with this sprint, when it’s all done, can someone do like keshi also says in euphoria, “so kiss me and put me to sleep tonight..” lord knows we’re gonna need it after the marathon.
to understand how to document running, i think having been connected to running has helped me..
thanks for reading.
carl. x.
ps.. ya’ll see that tennis shirt in the photo with the puppy? been thinking what i wrote about recently, prediction 8.